Quest For Fire

Look on your map and find Texas and see where Houston’s...

Mon, 08 Apr 2013 12:01:46 -0400

Houstey! We don't have a problem!

Bootz and skullz. Favz!!!

Bootin'

ROOM OF LAZERS!!!!

Look on your map and find Texas and see where Houston’s at. That’s probably where most of these pictures where taken. Man, that woulda sounded better if it rhymed. Good thing I’m saving my rhymes for my debut album! Can’t let the haters steal ma rhymin words!

Houston is much like a more worn in Dallas in some ways. Oh don’t worry Dallas, the traffic wasn’t as bad as you. Know one can take that away form you. And instead of a president having been shot in in it, they got a space command center!

My best thing about staying in Houston was meeting up with the people of a co-op to have a place to rest my bones. For those of you not in the the know, a co-op is like one step up from a hippy commune. Difference is there’s more people wearing shoes and carpeted areas and only a little less guitar playing. Don’t worry though, the positive vibes are still there though. And you get woken up in the morning by 10+ people doing their morning routine!? Bonus!

I did some hang sessions in Montrose which is considered the art district. There’s fun times to be had in that part of town. Went to an art show there that had a room full of lasers with a fortune teller. I mean, it kinda defeats the point of having some one telling you your future in a ROOM OF LAZERS! Who cares about their future fortune if they are already in a room with beams of light crossing and weaving a majestic space of awesome heck yeah visiony stuff!!

I would also suggest that you check out Texas Junk Company. They basically have an incredible selection of used cowboy boots. Go there and get some unless you’re one of those weird people who doesn’t like cowboy boots. Gross, stop reading my words! Haha! Just kidding, cowboy boot wearers aren’t all mean!

Had a splendid time in Houstey and would like to thank Paul and er’ body at the Rosalie House. Y’all know who you are and although it’s been some time since I was there, I haven’t forgotten you. Hi five each other and imagine it’s me!

Marky does Dallas! Or that town did me. It was the traffic...

Wed, 13 Feb 2013 12:01:39 -0500

Night time Dall Dall

Day time Dall Dall

Murica

Modern architecture of a giant toil let

JFK's ghost should totally come and haunt this thing.

Me and the A-team--well my last name starts with an "A" I'll just say A-team.

One of these is green knife and the other is a silver shiny knife reflecting the other while they stab the sky with beauty.

80 millions high school foosball stadium! It's massive up in there!

The Reverend Horton Heat's it up!

Ma new ride!

Marky does Dallas! Or that town did me. It was the traffic that did it too. Apparently D-town is super important! Why else would all these people be driving around in it! There must have been a Dallas Cowboy’s memorobillia sale goin on somewhere in town the week and a half period I was there. Must’ve been one of those sales where if you drive a Mercedes Benz you get a discount. You also get a discount for honking your horn at motorcycle riders that are driving up the middle lane in stopped highway traffic. I’m glad some people took advantage of my lane splitting while I did it.

Dallas don’t care if your the leader of the free world, motorcycle rider, or a person who knows how to correctly use the word “don’t.” It’ll show you the most beautiful city sky line at night. I really do mean this. Between the tall silvery reflective building, the light up ball tower thing, the giant green light one and assorted smaller building with strategic lighting DT D looked great at night. If I was another city nigh sky light, I’d totally try to get Dallas’s number. Hopefully she wouldn’t draw her gun on me and shoot me. Don’t believe me, just watch Robo Cop. It was totally filmed there.

I went to grassy knoll to see where the presidential assignation occurred and it looked just like it did on all the TV shows about it. It was especially real for me b/c I kept seeing the same guy around the area who kept wanting to talk to me b/c I had a shirt with my favorite jet on it, the SR-71 Black Bird. It’s the only jet that the Beatles wrote a song for so I get why people are totally into them. The X-men even rode around in one for cryin’ out loud! Any ways, I’d go the gas station to grab so hot cheatos and takis and bam, there was the guy. I went back to my friends car to pay the parking dude and bam! He was there too. I’m just glad I had a creeper at the site to give me a good uneasy feeling about visiting the grassy knoll. Way better than just feeling regular when going there.

I also went to the JFK memorial which in it’s own words was erected and “… not a memorial to the pain and sorrow of death, but stands as a permanent tribute to the joy and excitement of one man’s life” It does this by showing solemn square slab of marble with JFK’s name on it in an empty walled space modeled after a cenotaph, or open grave. Ha! And some people think you can’t learn new words from listening to heavy metal! And being as I refuse to be totally bummed out by this monument that reminds that a person is dead even though it’s not supposed to, I’ll think of it as the sweetest spot JFK’s ghost to haunt people. Think about it, tons of unsuspecting tourists walking around. Tons of dudes wanting to talk to people in SR-71 black bird shirts but instead get to get scared by a ghost. It would be sweet for a presidential spector! If you’re one of those weirdos (bad kind) that don’t believe in ghosts, not even for fun, I’ll say I guess a JFK impersonator could totally come in there and stand in the middle. Yeah, not as awesome as a haunting sesh.

Dallas also taught me that if you love something, make an 80-million dollar stadium commemorating it. No joke, they have an 80-million doll hair (US) stadium for high school football. It’s pretty awesome. I used the bathroom there and they even had individual urinals, something not even my college stadium had (they had troughs or depending on your life outlook, level of inebriation, and susceptibility to peer pressure, bath tubs). My host’s Amy and Alan or as they known on the mean streets, the A-team, indulged me by taking me to a game. I even was fortunate enough to catch a field goal after it had been kicked though. You know 80 million dollar stadiums don’t put up field goal nets as a fun perk for the fans who have high enough class to attend such an event.

If you do make it out to Dally Tally, make sure to hit up section of town called Deep Ellum. I know it sounds like you’ll need to pack some cave exploring gear but you can just go in your regular surface walking clothes. I saw the Reverend Horton Heat there who are home town band who play rockabilly jamz. I also hung out at the greatest of bars called Juley Alley. It was full of wierdos with awesome stories from as far as Fort Worth! Haha, just kidding. Met a pro-skater from England who knew of Kona Skate park when I told him I was originally from Jacksonville, FL. Met photographer from NYC. Got to ride another motorcycle that was little and awesome! Met a goil who was filming for a not so realitical reality show and much much more. I guess you’ll have to find me in person to get all the stories :)

I had a great time in Dallas and would like to thank Amy, Allan, and their dog, Jackson, who followed me around the house as he was born for people with low self esteem. To Cristen for showing me some cool spots and feeding me some Dallas foods.

Austin starts with the same vowel sound that the word awesome...

Mon, 11 Feb 2013 12:25:35 -0500

Austin doin it's thang.

Great place to get slizes, homes.

Chicken crap bingo happens here!

People creepin on a poor chicken waiting for it to poop.

Austin Paradise

Buck wild

Me and my crew, Jon'n Alissa.

The capitol of TX. Pft, where's the horses.

Austin starts with the same vowel sound that the word awesome does and it aint no ka-nicka-nick. Austin, TX has the goods. What kinda goods? How ‘bout tons of babes, delish food, used coybow boots, bands jammin’ jams and all kinds of awesome.

Austin is hands down one of my favorite cities in these United States. The thing that really drove it home for me was how nice every one is. Nothing epitomized this more than trip to the grocery store in which every interaction I had with humans was positive one. Parked my moto next another dude and swapped riding tales immediately, had an old man unprovokedly tell me some jokes, had a lady laugh at my remarks about her choice of cereal and had funny talk with some rando dude about the magazines in while waiting in check out. It was like a music video to the song Rain Drops Keep Falling on My Head and I was just buying PB&J ingredients!

One of the nights I went out I happened on what looked like a honky tonk band all dressed to the nines with cowboy hats, bolo ties, sunglasses, and suits complete with telecaster guitars who then proceeded to play heavy metal covers! What the what!?

Austin does all kinds of weird and different stuff. I went to a saloon that does chicken poop bingo. It’s like regular bingo but instead of doin the boring regular random number drawing, the numbers are drawn by where a chicken in a cage takes a doo doo. It’s especially hilarious when you realize how many grown adults are sitting around watching a chicken relieve it’s bowels.

When you combine the good eats, good peeps, and chickens making bingo happen, you get a cool place like Austin. There’s a music festival there like every month. It’s quite awesome, or Austum. I highly recommend this town. Don’t let my lack of pictures fool you. In fact let them convey that did more fun having than picture taking which really the best way. Austin even had my favorite pinball machine for dang sakes!

Special thanks to PN Peck and his lady girl, Alissa. Their blow up mattress was quite exceptional! That and they are great human beings :)

Remember the Alamo! Also remember the cherry picker they parked...

Sun, 10 Feb 2013 12:01:47 -0500

Dark Alamo!

Remember the Alamo statue!

Alamo peeps

Lady lib.

Remember that sweet Christmas lighted building in DT San Antone!

No jet ski's :(

Still no jet ski's :(

Remember the Alamo! Also remember the cherry picker they parked out front of it! I was soooo glad that it was there for the photos i took of it. No wonder Texan’s have a lot of pride. They had cherry picker technology well ahead of every one else during Davey Crocket time!

The funny thing about the Alamo besides it’s lack of basement, is that it’s actually in the middle of downtown San Antonio. And when I say down town San Antone, I mean big buildings and everything. Due to a Texan law, it is forbidden to build buildings taller than the Alamo behind the Alamo. They probably take your bolo ties and shootin riffles away or something if you break it. B/c of this, the Alamo always looks like it’s in just a flat deserty area in movies or in your memory when you’re remembering it.

Right next to Alamo is spectacular Texas-oh-yeah statue commemorating those who died at the Alamo. It’s got the main dudes who fought against Santa Ana, a lady liberty on the back and this dude ascending up with v-for-victory hands. It’s basically to legit to quit-excuse me-2legit2quit.

San Antone is complete with a river walk that runs through it which is basically the sickest jet ski race track ever made ever. I didn’t see an jet ski racin’ on it but I’m sure it happens. It has to!

Spur town is definitely in a region that is very Tex Mex. Aside from making it a food eater’s paradise (had the best chicken tortilla soup ever), it’s not uncommon to see a TexMexian dude with a cowboy hat drving a super huge truck all the while having Mariachi blasting at a bagillion decibels. I know! Thank goodness!

I would like to extend a very special thanks to my gracious host, Jaime, for being totally cool and having a place for this dude to crash.

When my favorite rockin’ band, Thin Lizzy, wrote Cowboy...

Sat, 09 Feb 2013 12:02:00 -0500

Don't let the eye patch, incredible shirt, countenance, and manlike mustache fool you. Ty's a nice dude!

Skullz

Picture taken at the Lost Horse saloon by another traveler. Check her blog: http://heyaster.wordpress.com

Cowboy art to look at when your peein in a certain rest stop bath room in West Texas.

When my favorite rockin’ band, Thin Lizzy, wrote Cowboy Song, they must of been talking about West Texas. Wes-Tex (spoken quickly) is just cowboyee. Deserts; mountains; dudes blocking your way on a road b/c they are moving cattle; and bar owners with cowboy hats, mustaches and eye patches. They’re all here!

When arrived in Wes-Tex, I proceeded to immediately run out of gas. While the jury is still out on whether EVERYTHING is bigger in TX, the stretches of road from town to town are. Luckily for me I saw a sign in the brush in that in big letters that said “GAS.” Even luckier, I was greeted by a dude with a southern drawl (first one in a while, thank Gord) who proceeded to fill up my gas tank while his talking mouth held a lit cigarette. Ya’ll know the one. It’s the motorcycle gas tank that to fill you have to stand over it whilst petrol fumes come spill out. Oh, don’t worry, the gas container was large and barely manageable with two grown man arms. I’m so I’m blessed. Some people get to Wes-Tex and don’t run out of gas. They totally miss out on the pleasure of finding gas at the last second in the middle of the desert. Even more so, some people don’t have the unforgettable pleasure having a redneck guy dangerously fill your tank as he’s smoking a fag. Most importantly, some people could have this happen and not know it’s a blessing and that’s what I’m most thankful for. And yeah, I just typed that so clearly I din’t get lit on fire nor did my bike.

Wes-Tex has Marfa, TX in it. Marfa is a cool little artist town. Think of it like a Joshua Tree (see previous posts on Joshy tree. It’s a cool place, well warm actually b/c it’s in the desert but you get me) in Texas ‘cept when you go to the gas station there, you stand a pretty good chance at seeing a guy with spurs on his boots. They’ll be covered in dirt from coyboyin’ all day. Remember, this is Wes-Tex, all that stuff about having cattle in the not-so-hospitable desert really happens here.

Marfa also has the Marfa Lights which are the equivalent of the Texan Aurora Borealis. There’s even a nice rest stop that some local land owners donated to erect a place you can pee in while watching for the lights. I can attest to place as I spent the night next to it in my tent freezing the parts of me that wasn’t covered by motorcycle jacket as I had every possible layer of clothing on and a sleeping bag. I did see some lights although nothing really that couldn’t have been cell or radio tower. However, since it won’t be disproven, I’m just gonna believe the lights I saw were the magic ones spoken of. There, now my life just got a little better. Thanks belief! The lights were so small pictures really didn’t capture much of anything. You’ll just have to use your imagination. And you thought you wouldn’t have to do that on the internet!

If and when you go to Marfa, make sure to hit up the town’s saloon, the Lost Horse. The night was pretty cold; somewhere below freezing. I wasn’t sure if should find camp or mingle with the locals but on the insistance of a coin flip, I checked out the bar. Glad I did b/c it was awesome. The bar owner, Ty, was a great guy. He had a southern accent that sounded Sam Elliot, a killer stache, a cowboy hat and an eye patch. An EYE PATCH! Bought every one a round of drinks and took pictures with me and several other travelers. To make matters texasier, a tex mex dude, also with a cowboy hat, was at the corner of the bar singing to the marriachi that was playing on speakers. He knew all the words and when a horn part or lyric he liked played, he yell out a loud “aaayyyyeeeeeeeeeee” with a grin on his face. The saloon had cow skulls on it too! I looked at the girl next to me and asked if this place was real. She said “yeah” so it must’ve been.

And Marfa is close to another word that could be used in conjunction with a curse word?! Not that I say those. They’re bad, y’all! If you go to the desert, check West Texas. Even the rest stop bathrooms have cowboyee tile art in em!

Special thanks to Sash and Ash! Thanks for the photo. Travel safe!

Starts with an “R” and ends with “idin’...

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 12:01:42 -0500

I rode in about 3 hours of rain to get to this. :)

I'm a Park Ranger y'all! Carlsbad Caves!

Mr. Imus pretty much has the most intense sign ever. I guess I would be too if I traveled in time from when people shot muskets.

Lookin' good New Mexico!

Navajo rez art. Haha, that one Nav-dude's ding dong got ripped.

So pervy!

The decent into Carlsbad cav.

VLA! Just yell it. Way more fun to say acronyms that way.

Petrified forrest!? Where are the trees though?

This would be so good on the end of a necklace and you know it.

Starts with an “R” and ends with “idin’ Randoms”

That’s right people and aliens that will eventually go on the internet, Ridin’ Randoms!

These were taken in what is probably the best place to ride a motor cyclin’ bike in the US-o-A, the South West. Good people, weather and big country are there. Well except the good weather part b/c the first snow was coming in from the north west behind a cold front. I was riding to not be in it. It was pretty exciting b/c if I broke down for even a day, I’d be covered in snow and freezin’ ma man parts. It was like playing high stakes poker except no cards and instead I was riding a motorcycle across Arizona, New Mex and Tex.

The wind made my New Mex ride so gnar, some times I couldn’t see more from the sand blowing every which way. However, once the break in the clouds would come, it was something beautiful; a great reminder that sometimes grinning and persevering is rewarded.

I made it on the Navajo rez and did the whole eat fry bread (think Navajo version of funnel cakes….mmmmmmm….Navajo version of funnel cakes), saw a dude who was walking across the earth (know b/c he had a website on his cart for it) and bought a nice Oldman/Gambler/Perv ring fashioned right there in the rez. I would like to thank my boi, Moto Bikin’ Alex from Chi-city Chicago who gave me the idea at Burning Man!

While in New Mex, I went by the Very Large Array, which is basically a large array (I know! who woulda thunkit?) that’s used for radio astronomy. It’s even cooler when you imagine Jodie Foster there with you giving you a tour in her Kermit, The Frog, like voice. Sucha a babe!

Visited the Carlsbad caverns and let me tell you, it wasn’t the Carlsgood caverns. All I could think about was how cool it would be to live at the bottom of ‘em. So bad!

I also went to the petrified forrest. A million bilion zillion years ago these trees fell down and got covered in doo doo mud. They then became really cool looking rocks that should be made into jewelry. I’m not talking about perv rings, although I can unbiasedly say dem thangs are sweet, I’m talking about a big ole gangsta necka-lace or a super gnar belt buckle. I guess the good thing about them being protected by the national park system is now this place that inspires great visions of amazing jewelry will be preserved for generations.

Grand Canyon so grand, it gets another blog post! The canyon...

Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:02:02 -0500

Smokin!

Juh juh juh G- Canyon!

Canyon tower. Tell me you don't wanna fire crossbows off it! Liar!

Indian dudes doin some mystical indian stuff.

The spirally insides. Spiral stairs are pretty much the best.

Grand

Some on on the Nevada side is smoking something.

This is the vantage from the tower. Pretty beautiful.

Grand Canyon so grand, it gets another blog post!

The canyon also has a neato-burrito tower on it that’s adorned with Native American art. It gives you a great vantage to look out at the vastness of the mother beezshmo. And like every tower I’ve been on, it makes you wish you had a bone’n arrow to shoot at stuff with.

I actually intended on hiking the canyon with newly acquainted friend, Toronto Jesse, named that b/c well, that’s where she’s from. I knew the dangers as I had already seen the Brady Bunch episodes where they went down in the canyon. I aint ‘fraid a no snake! However, some work circumstances arose for TJ and forced me to take the trip by myself.

To make matters more adventured, there was a large cold front coming through with the season’s first snow. I had literally one day to see the G-Can as fast as I could before the next day dropped below freezin’ with snow. Sadly my bike isn’t one of those ones that transforms into snow mobile so I had to move it. That meant no hikes and no eating your hiking partner b/c you’re snowed in and forced to cannibalism.

Good thing motorcycles are faster than snow storms. Long story short:

Northern AZ snow storm 0

Marc Alessandria 1

The Grand Canyon is not misnomered! Or maybe it is b/c grand...

Wed, 06 Feb 2013 16:57:00 -0500

Gi-gor-bus!

You thought you'd get to creep on the canyon without, we the internet, not creep on you!?

Peeps checkin it out.

In the face of heights induced fear remember the Klingons! Survive and Succeed!

Yeah, this would be way cooler if were the death star.

Something beautiful

Grand map of the the Grand Canyon

Grand picture of the the Grand Canyon

The Grand Canyon is not misnomered! Or maybe it is b/c grand almost doesn’t do it justice to how big the dang things. In fact I think if “gigorbus” had been in the english lexicon at the time, it would have been named the Gigobrus Canyon by the white people that ignored whatever the natives named it. However grand was all they had and dangnummit was it not good enough.

This thing is so big, I disavow any fat momma jokes using the size of the canyon to relate to the size of someone’s obese mother. You can see the thing from space! Suck it great wall of China! Oh? What’s that, you’re cooler b/c you were built by people and not Jesus?! if that’s the case, how come there are bunch of Chinamen tourist folk walking all over the GC?! Score board, Mao’s republic!

When you look down the canyon, you’ll see a cliff that leads to another step and eventually another cliff which in turn leads to another break going deeper. This happens like 4 or 5 times until you can’t see the bottom. Told you no fat momma could fill this thing!

Even the diarama’s and diagrams of the G-Canyon were massive. The lobby of the park included a floating planet to show how you could see this thing from space no problem. Not only that, but it made me realize I need one of these suspended/light-up planets in my house, cept it won’t be the Earth, it’ll be the Death Star! Sick!

The pictures shown really don’t bring home how massive this thing is and that’s great. That way when you go there yourself your mind will get good and blown. Even standing next to the rail to take photos was a little nerve racking. Luckily I scored the sweetest Star Trek shirt in Phoenix that features the alien race known as the Klingons. It was in remembering their honor code and bravery that helped keep me confident in the face of potential cliff fallin.

Duh duh deh deh duh-deh ARI-ZONA!!! it’s got lots of...

Tue, 05 Feb 2013 12:01:38 -0500

Arizona: It kinda looks like Mars at dusk here.

I know what you like, geologists....naughty geologists...

Totally tall enough to be sad under whilst wearing a sombrero.

Sedona rocks. But there's no guitars?!

Rocky

Fat lady in front of an apt. I know, weird! We should live there!

Photo gallery of moon photo's. You might break your legs off, walking on the moon.

"Stair into my eyes!"

Duh duh deh deh duh-deh

ARI-ZONA!!!

it’s got lots of rocks. Lots of rocks. When I was motorcycling through ARIZONA!

You better have sang that just now like the My Sharona song by the Knack. It’ll make your life better. Just like visiting Arizona.

It’s got Mesa’s, mountains, desert and rocks! Tons of em and dang do they look good. Not to mention I finally saw some crucial cacti there! I’m talking me huge ones that are so tall, if you were depressed, you could put on a sombrero and sit underneath it all sad like. A good chunk of the photo’s of rocks were taken just north of Phoenix in Sedona, AZ. It’s pretty good lookin up in that muh!

I stayed in Phoenix AZ b/c I figured if it’s named after a mystical bird of fire that can’t be killed it must be cool! I’m glad I did as it was great town. I didn’t see any mystycal birds up in it but they make sure to put the bird symbol on all the street signs to remind you. Risen from the ashes!!! Ashes probably from the heat of the summers there in mystical bird town but hey, I went in the fall and it was nothing but wearing shorts and eating ice-cream. Both regular and astronaut of course!

But did I dress up as a gypsy for Halloween?! Dang yeah, I did. The best thing about dressing up like that was getting different names from people. One guy even called me Barabus! Dang dude, it aint Easter yet!

I would like to graciously thank my couchsurfing host, Freedom, for making me welcome in her home. He’s great just like the thing she’s named after! To her son, Cedar. You better be reading this, dude! And special shout to Amanda’n Chief for laughing at my jokes and understanding the pleasures of astronaut ice-cream.

I was told by some one in Las Vegas that the Hoover Dam was no...

Mon, 04 Feb 2013 14:45:43 -0500

Won't you come and dam that river!

The guts

Statue dude, whateva...

"Redirect power to the main engines!"

Angel-dude statue.

Door to Narnia or hoover dam. One of those.

Towa of Powa

This the bridge creeping on the dam. They let you walk across it too!

Let's skate!

I love it when we're Hoovin together!

I was told by some one in Las Vegas that the Hoover Dam was no big deal. Just a bunch cement blocking a lake. Good thing that person told me that too b/c it set the bar way low to get totally lept over by how awesome Hoover D is!

Not only does it give power to a chunk of South Western US and serve as the most gnar skate bowl ever, it also is adorned with cool statues and flare that a building from it’s period would have. I’m talking gold doors, angel-dude statues and architectural embellishments that make Hoover the Belle of the ball in the dam world. That’s assuming dam’s have a ball. But don’t think for a minute that Hoover couldn’t get into a dress! He’s a fit one mos def!

I brought along my Swiss friend Evie. She’s blond haired and blue eyed kept insisting that we get some hot chocolate even though it was like 80 degrees out (25 C for you other weirdoes). Yeah, I was just joking about one of those descriptions :) We talked life, travel, and of course the advantages to hydro-electric power. Thanks for the company, girlie!

If you do go to Hoover Damn, definitely take the tour. They take you into the guts of the thing and you can see all kinds a neat stuff like the diagram of the water flow. It’s one of those pictures made of transparent glass/plastic with a layer below it moving making the pictures look like it’s alive. Kinda like something you’d see on the bridge of the USS Enterprise. Numba one, Engage!

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it infinity times,...

Sun, 03 Feb 2013 12:02:00 -0500

F-werdin' HOSTEL!!!! Picture compliment of Gallery Nightclub photography.

Hostel Cat van hoe!!! Yep, no fun happening here.

Me a show goil. Thumbs up!

Every night we're hostelin!

Old strip, Bold strip

"Howdy, welcome to old strip!"

BAP BAP BAP! Rock'n roll goes fast!

Wall o Gerns!

I dead!

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it infinity times, hostel living is great. And yes, Murry (‘murica, ‘merica, America) has tons of em. I stayed at Hostel Cat in Lost Vegnast. It’s basically named after one of the best animals already so it’s got that going for itself (kitties4life). HC has some really great things going for it which are what I think make a great hostel:

1. The staff are young people traveling and live there. They give a poop b/c ultimately, if they are contributing to an awful atmosphere, they are pooping where they eat. Wait, I think I just confused myself as to distribution of fecal matter, but I think you figured it out. You so smart, internet bloggin’ reader!

2. The dude who runs the thing makes sure to always plan thing with the hostel every night. One night is nickel beer night at a local bar, the next might be getting er’body scared at a haunted theme park (this occurred in october. I know, we’re time travelers!). Always something to do = getting into good trouble with new friends.

3. And what might be overlooked but I feel is essential to good hostel hanging, HC had a good layout. That is to say that the common space was large and in the middle of the hostel and the barrack rooms were off to the side and not exactly the most comfortable place to hang. Comfort?! Over rated. If I wanted comfort I’d live in a hot tub and never have interactions that are in a crappy non-warm water areas. Not being the most comfortable means people are more likely to reach out for experiences. This means people get out and meet, talk, and forge stronger relationships together by doing goofy stuff together! Amen!

And to make matters awesomer, the main manager dude of the Cat had an old van that he used to live in as he travelled the country. It’s basically what some people would think a person of questionable intent uses to drive around. Since I have an affinity for vans (especially if dragons, wizards, or indians are painted on the side of em), I see them as something driven by a person with AWESOME intent who only has physical interactions with adults!

So whenever there was something fun to do, like every night, every one in the hostel would pile up in the back of this thing and holy crap was it dangerous. Dangerous and Awesome! To make things more adventurly, you can’t really see out the windows as you’re hitting all kinds of bumps and being pressed into a bunch of newly acquainted strangers. The party van was basically human blender for a fun smoothy. You couldn’t move and you hurt from having something poking your butt or some one’s elbow is in your man (or lady) boobs, but you couldn’t care less b/c that’s what happens when you’re laughing. Don’t take my word for it, look at the pictures and, jeez leweez, go to this hostel if you ever visit The Vegas.

We went to a great local bar/hang/dancin’ spot called the Beauty Bar. It’s in the old strip which I’m gonna say is way better than the “new” strip. You see, the new strip is basically a bunch of tacky, vegasy stuff trying to pose as something nice and special. Pft, it aint a sunset over the mountains or a sunny day, it’s just a bunch of stucko and people spending money gambling. The old strip is that way too but it makes no effort to hide what it is. Old Vegas strip be like “I’m tacky and I like it, whatever. Here, stare at this spinning, light-up high heel shoe.” It has a way cooler vibe. Heck, when the hostel crew rolled up to it, we met a lot friendly locals. Locals! In short:

Old Vegas strip > “new” Vegas strip.

(Remember people reading this, the alligator EATS the bigger thing)

I definitely had fun with the hostel crew. Went shooting with some kids from England and Switzerland. Apparently you can’t shoot guns over there that easily. Not even celebratorilly into the air or nothing! In Vegas you can go to assault weapons ranges and shoot all kinds of killen guns and it’s awesome!!!

Whad’ I shoot you ask? A tommy Gun!!!! I loved it! They haven’t made new tommy guns since 1940-something so all the ones in existence have a substantial amount of history behind them. For all i know, the one I shot had killed a bunch of nazi’s or been used in gangster shoot outs. That history becomes incredibly apparent as the majority of the gun is made of wood. An aged wood that’s all beat up from the aforementioned murdrin. Gnar!

There are several different places too shoot in The Vegas but I found the best was this place called American Shooters. I dug ‘Murican shooters the mostest b/c although you had to do more paperwork, they let you load the guns your self. There’s something exciting about the tactile clicking sounds of metal parts sliding and banging together. Not to mention the gun-staff-dude helping me with the Tommy was great as described shooting the tommy as rock’n roll and that rock’n roll goes fast. He was right b/c I dumped 40 bullets into my dangerous person target like that!

Danced like a weirdo, played freeze tag, taught some Euro’s the splendor of the 2nd Ammendment, and got to bring the party anywhere I went all thanks to the hostel and my life being blessed.

Special shout out to Evie, Paul, Rachel, and Mark. Hostellin’ with the best is the best!

Vivas Los Vegas! And I don’t even speak spanish!...

Sat, 02 Feb 2013 12:01:48 -0500

No "if's" or "ands" but there isn't a no hands.

It looks strange through the lens of a camera, not just the eyes of Hunter S. Thompson.

Sins are prolly happening in this thing as we speak, or read, or type on the internet. One of those.

Tangerin'

Bringing down the house!

Killer three headed beast statue. Traditionally, 3-headed beasts' heads are all similar, not in Vegas-ville. Lion head!

Lighty upy sign!

I have no idea who this babe is but we look great! Compliments of Collective Zoo photography and also me and this babe for rockin' our shtuff.

I have no ide who this dude is but we look great! And he's got a bow on. Baller.

Vivas Los Vegas! And I don’t even speak spanish!

Without a Burning Man festival to suck me into itself, getting to Vegas was a sinch. I was on a mission you see: FUN. I want fun and I want it all the time. I don’t care how I get it. It’s actually more of a standing order really. And even though fun is where you make it, Vegas greases the treads of the fun tank for sure.

Even some exotic lookin ladies hangin on the main drag asked me if I was looking for fun. Duh, why else would I be walking to a casino?! To have fun and win some money. HA! Just joshin, I didn’t win any money. But I totally tricked myself into thinkin’ I just might and that was fun. Also I really didn’t care either way which was also fun. That’s 2 fun sources in one act!

I had all kinds of fun. Took photo’s with strangers whom I still have no idea are, unintentionally happened upon a string quartet who were playing classic rock covers including the song “Comon Ilelene” which of course lead me to dance with an old lady, touched some statue butts, got followed by a weird dude only to loose him successfully (alright!), and even went to a haunted theme park. It was great. I even got to play an impromptu game of freeze tag in upper balcony area of of a casino. I was “it” and totally won; both at freezin’ er’ body but also narrowly escaping crasino security.

“But Marky pants. You aint got enough friends in LV to do some Freezy T.” you say. And while I didn’t at first and Las Vegas, like most cities in the US, is full of people that speak the same language as I, I accelerated the hang by going to a great hostel, but more on that in my continuation what I will name improvisastionally right now as I type: Vegas funfest II: Going Hostel!!!11!!

Desert riding is the best and now I’m gonna tell you why....

Fri, 01 Feb 2013 12:01:58 -0500

I'm pretty sure I drove down this whole thing.

A common down to up road view.

Right out side Death Valley. I guess that would make it Life Valley?

Right before I set up for the night. The famous spot scorpion sleeping session.

You can't see it but I'm grinning here.

Nevadan Dez.

From this distance, it looks like there aren't any scorpions on those mountains.

Desert riding is the best and now I’m gonna tell you why. It’s typically sunny and although it’s not uncommon to be warm, that’s not a problem as long as you’re moving. It’s easy find sleepin spots as pretty much it’s all one giant sleeping spot. The stars come out something fierce. The rise and setting of the sun is dramatic, colorful, and most importantly, visible. The desert is open with mountains and is deserving being called big country. My time smiling to time not smiling ratio while desert ridin was at it’s peak. Good thing there weren’t alot of bugs in the desert or I woulda had one fly in my mouth (the part that isn’t covered by mustache hair, duh!).

I went to death valley….and lived! I know! I should be...

Thu, 31 Jan 2013 12:02:00 -0500

Live to ride into death! Haha, J/K, I lived.

Ambush zone.

From above all the crushed bones from the dead animals/people look like sand. Or maybe it is sand, we don't know, it's only internet!

Another ambushy area

woah...savage

Here comes the sun

More like ice scatting valley! Actually it's salt.

I totally fantasized about having a rock cutting laser on the front of my moto that would cut through the rock as I rode into it

Death Mnts.

I went to death valley….and lived! I know! I should be ona those bumper sticker designer dudes. But seriously, I went to death Valley and survived. It wasn’t really hard. There’s a road that runs right through it and there’s some gas station and general stores with water fountains.

For a place with the word death in it I expected to see some skullz at least but I didn’t. Hey, having room for improvement means you can always get better. Don’t despair DV! And don’t let the lack of skullz fool you either, there’s some totally ambushy spots. For a while there I was glad I wasn’t a small android that moved on 3 wheels or else a strange group of hooded creatures who scavenge the desert might abduct me!

It was definitely hotter than a mother’s business at the bottom and very cool when you went up the mountains adjacent to the valley bellow.

I definitely had a great morning riding in there as I had spend the night before sleepin in the open desert in the valley out side the death one. What would have been an otherwise starry night turned into something of a light sand storm. To make things more interesting, I didn’t pitch a tent that night b/c I haven’t gotten good at predicting the future yet. Had to cover my mouth and eyes with goggles and pretend I wasn’t miserable for 2 hours until I eventually fell asleep. It coulda been worse though, I could have woken up with a scorpion next to my head—Oh wait! That did happen! HAHA! Check that one off the list! Next!

The main reason I stayed in Joshy tree as long as I did, aside...

Mon, 28 Jan 2013 12:01:58 -0500

Not a transformer?! :(

What is this?! An Integratron for ants!!!!

The main dude of this thing, Georgie Van T.

The under guts of this thing.

OOH! I'm the the only one not asleep right here!

What the top looks like!

The main reason I stayed in Joshy tree as long as I did, aside from the fact that it was super easy to find sleeping spot in the desert next to the road, was the Integratron!

Let me just first say, sadly, it isn’t a robot (pronounced row-bit) that does calculus equations involving integration (my favorite…J/K. Derivatives are wayyyy better). Secondly, happily it was designed by a dude who was contacted by aliens and is apposed to cure you of the whole dying when you’re old thing!

Well I don’t know about all that but that’s the story. Originally this dome, the Integratron, was built on the earth’s magnetic fault line. It was intended that the top of the dome would spin under this magnetic flux and cause a concentration of electricity to shoot through the center. Basically, while this is happening, a lucky person would walk in while this was happening and blamo. One minute they were a total poseur and the next, the truest of ballers! The electricity would rejuvenate your cells. Thanks otherworldly aliens and your cray cray techmology!

Unfortunately, this place was never completed as the main dude, George Van Tassel, had a little bit a tussle with his mortally before it could be completed. He dead. Now they have sound baths on the top floor. It consists of laying down and listening to this lady make sounds with giant bowls that hum after they are rubbed on their edge like a crystal glass. Once that happens, you just fall asleep and snore sending the sounds reverberating to the person on the opposite side of you in the dome. Sucks to be that dude!

I actually stayed in J-tree a day longer b/c I met the dude who runs this thing and he told me I should stay and see more. So I flipped a coin and it turns out I should stay an extra day to stay. Good thing too, b/c then I got to see the guts of the inside of this thing!

With all these posts some of you might be wondering if Joshua...

Sun, 27 Jan 2013 14:26:41 -0500

Stuff with skulls on it > than stuff without

Indian dude guardin some stuff!

This is what the bar looks like

Cool Decor for sure!!

Boots Electric from Eagles of Death Metal. That guys hangin up in there?! It must be cool!

Motel, Hotel, Holiday-Inn!

The sign says "OK Corrale" Alright-I mean, OK!

Stop! And do what this sign says!

Old Church

With all these posts some of you might be wondering if Joshua Tree is a cool place in the desert, how come it doesn’t have a town that used to be used to film westerns there. And in that town, people moved in and made the set buildings into a community. Well they have! It’s called pioneer town and it’s totally righteous.

Whilst there I went to a cool bar there Pappy and Harriet’s. It was adorned with some great decor including cowboy photo’s and chandeliers. Met some some US marines there and discussed life and mackin on babes on foreign countries when you’re on leave as a Marine. Something I didn’t know much about but they were experts. I made some friends from strangers from CA and NYC. Hey, I spoke english and so did they. Basically a perfect sitch to trade jokes and high five each other. There was also a live band there and I danced with some old ladies who knew how to have fun. The band even covered an oldie but a goodie of a jam: C’mon Everybody by Eddie Cochran. If you don’t know the song I’m hear to let you know!

I didn’t really see any pioneers up in Pioneer town. It more like a ghost town so I just creeped around and took pictures all while imagining that all the townsfolk were scared about a gun fight that was gonna happen a little later. Don’t worry, I got outa there before bullets started flying!

Right now you might be thinking: ”Marc, what is a Joshua...

Sat, 26 Jan 2013 12:01:41 -0500

Skullz

This thing is Joshin with us!

Me up in it!

Gittin dey climb on!

The view

Deserty, amirite?!

A great campsite especially if you have an airstream or just a sleeping bag.

Skullz

It's big out there!

Yo! Chollo

Right now you might be thinking: ”Marc, what is a Joshua Tree-Where is a Joshua Tree-When is a Joshua Tree-Why is a Joshua Tree-Who is a Josha Tree!?” To which I can only reply, “Jeez-dang! Good job with using your skills of inquiry most likely first honed in 2nd grade while doing current event reports.”

Basically, when the Mormo’s came out the desert they saw these trees and named the Joshua trees b/c they thought they looked like Joshua from the bible reaching up to the heavens to praise him some Jesus. That’s funny b/c I always imagined Joshua looking like a Jewish dude who dressed in sandals and robe of some sorts.

Joshy Trees basically look like the Old Man let Dr. Sues design a tree that lives in the desert. They are these spikey trunked with green/stabby/leaves. Luckily, some old dude back in the day thought it would be good to preserve a section of the desert with these treese before some one found a way to make really sweet stabbing weapons with these and just chop them down to extinction. Oh I touched them and they pricked my finger. Alright!

A lot of these J Trees are all up in the Joshua Tree National Park. In addition to looking like the landscape of Lorax, it’s got some other cool stuff like a forrest of Chollo cacti in an aptly named. I visited them thangs and said “yo, chollo” to em and camped out in what might have been the coolest campsite ever as it was all secluded like in rock formations. And the park has a skull formation?!

If it’s soundin’ like Joshy Tree, CA is a cool place as it, in addition too it’s arty stuff, has a national park. Your ears are working right b/c it is awesome!

Next up was the town of Joshua Tree, CA. All I knew it was a...

Wed, 23 Jan 2013 11:01:00 -0500

Now we're talking.

Tower of Purifoycation

No internet?! :(

The shrine

Joshua-saurus Rex!

Danger, Will Robinson!

Vikangs!

Sound Advice mos def!

World Famous

Soo many!

Next up was the town of Joshua Tree, CA. All I knew it was a desert town and home of the rockin’ music group, The Queens of the Stone Age. I figured that since they weren’t really royalty, nor the proper gender for such a tittle, and didn’t have the time machines to have traveled back in time to rule said stone age, the must have been from some place interesting to come up with a band name with a fantastically implied back story.

It turned out Joshy tree was totally a cool town. There were bunch of art installs there and just gave a total “Dude, it’s the desert. Look at our art stuff. Whatevs” vibe. I can’t help feel the laid backedness had something to do with the sunny weather and funny desert trees which I’ll get to later.

I was suggested by a rando stranger to visit an art install called Noah Purifoy Out Desert Art Museum of Assemblage Sculpture or for all you acronysers out there, NPODAMAS. It’s basically this place in the desert where this dude, named Noah Purifoy, put his sculptures for you to go and look at em. With a name like Noah Purifoy, he coulda totally been an evil scientist or super villain but he totally went the opposite direction with the whole making art in the desert thing. When I got there, the place was closed off for some LAer’s to do a photo shoot with models and whatnot. They liked me so dang much they let me hang out and take my own pics and eat their food. Thanks photo’s shooting people from LA!

No real men motorcycle about the US and not appreciete crochet. So there was no way I wasn’t gonna hit up the World Famous Crochet Museum there in Joshy Tree. There was like an infinity of little crocheted animals and things. It was part of an art commune that had art for sale. I talked to the main dude there and swapped motor cycle stories. Isn’t having language awesome!

I made my way to a place called Slab City. Once upon a time it...

Sat, 19 Jan 2013 14:27:15 -0500

It's a sign! I wonder what it means....

Salvation truck for when you need salvation on the go

Salv. Mt.

That door's been saved!

The mountains guts

This is where slab city starts.

The north desert view

Salton sea, you so brutal! Fish Guts

Good thing we don't have internet smell technology. You're house would stank right now!

I made my way to a place called Slab City. Once upon a time it was a military base of some sorts but eventually it was left abandoned for people to come and squat on it. There’s basically a community of people who live there and are more or less outside society. They aren’t that fringey though b/c they speak english and have dogs. Who doesn’t have those?!

I was fortunate to happen upon some military trucks passing through the area heading north to only what I could imagine was either a night firing exercise or a repelling of a small alien invasion in Southern CA. Eitherway, I could hear distant gun fire accompanied with occasional flashes of light in the north near the mountains. Don’t worry, I wasn’t scared or nothin’ b/c I had all the dogs of Slab City barking most of the night to keep me reassured and all awake like. After finally falling to sleep, I was awakened by every one’s roosters cock-a-doodle-doo-ing. Slab city?! More like Loud Animal Noise Town. Nah, that doesn’t have a ring to it.

More importantly, Slab City is is the site of Salvation mountain which an art installation this dude did. It’s pretty amazing and has been featured in tons of movies. It’s got tons of Jesus and bible stuff up on it. I figured the least I can do is visit it in case my adventure gets movie-ized. Oh, don’t worry, it’ll have me rescuing orphans from burning buildings too. I could describe it words but no one even reads these things right? Internets is about pictures y’all!

Slab city is definitely prime real-estate. It’s only a minute or two away from the Salton Sea which is, that’s right (dang your smart!), a salt lake. Holy crap is it awesome/terrible. There a bunch of fish guts on the shore of it from all the fish dying form the high salinity. And the lake smelled all lank stanky!? Brutal.

San Diego gave the impression it was a baby LA except instead of...

Thu, 03 Jan 2013 14:22:00 -0500

Pretty!

Me and Dave partying b/c are lives are without questionly awesome!

This is what it looks like.

The revolutionary skate lock!

Me and my bro, Day Day. Surfs up!

St. Vincent, the patron saint of babe like ones.

Oh, it's just me holding a ROCKET LAUNCHER! Airshow's are awesome!

San Diego gave the impression it was a baby LA except instead of tons of fun traffic to ride through on a motorcycle, it had tons of dogs. Seriousely, never have I been to such a large city with so much dog friendliness. I do love doggies but this whole situation made me wonder about a city friendly to cats—Oh wait, kitties don’t care if a city likes them or not. They just run that town any ways! Kitties 4 life! And more importantly, using the number “4” when saying “for life” statements 4 life!

Sandy D is known for its surfing as it’s position in the Pacific Ocean gives it great waves all the time. I totally went with my brother and tried ripping tubes or whatever surfin’ types say. I didn’t really take pictures of that b/c I was too busy getting radical in the water. And buy getting “radical” I mean getting battered and destroyed by waves I was rather ill equipped to deal with due to my lack of experience. I know! Radical! I aint never scared! I also I aint never frozen except when I was in the freezy ma teezy water of the Pacific. Holy dang was it cold.

Speaking of my brother, that dude is pretty dang righteous. You thought I was the only one in my fam doing some living? This dude is a helicopter pilot for the Navy and stationed in San Diego. He gets radical like every single day. Sure he does paper worky stuff and boring briefs, but that just makes the whole spending hours in machine that flys with guns on it way more fun. And when that’s not happening, he gets to surf and laugh at his brother suck at surfing. What a life!

While in the D, I had the chance to catch one of my favorite rock artists who goes by the name St. Vincent. I can’t help but think I like her mostly b/c of how much she’s basically a babezilla stomping on the Tokyo City of hearts of all who behold her. Her performance was with David Byrne, formerly of the Talking Heads, who is basically the funnest dude ever. His whiteboy dance moves alone blew my what I thought was unblowable mind away (That’s what makes your mind getting blown so awesome any ways right?).

They played at this really cool venue in called Humphreys. You can be all boring and buy a ticket to see a show there orrrrr you can go all Capt. Ron and dock you boat and watch for free. Prolly the first time I wished my motorcycle was amphibious Haha! J/k, I wish that like every day!

San Diego has friendly people, buildings, and sunshine but who cares about that stuff!? They have a lock for your skate board! Finally!!!